We should not feel guilty about being, tired, down and sad...We are human and it is part of our DNA. What is important is HOW you turn things around and change what you are going through.
I know I can distance myself, keep quiet and try and ride out the emotions that I am going through alone.
I think this is where I feel and focus more on...The fact that I have been single for eternity and never been claimed as being someone's significant other or have anyone tell me anything of the such how they truly feel about me. I know that is what gets me down the most that I have not yet been able to reach that next stage in life. It seems like everyone else around me has moved on and I'm stuck. The fact that I never have had someone's all makes me think I will never have that. I am not going to lie it does become hard to express how I feel without thinking I'm sounding like a drip at times lol. But I guess everything happens for a reason.
I work in Mayfair, I have Oxford Street at my feet everyday, yet not even the materialistic things can now make me happy, it's not even about having someone give me a ring anymore. It's much more and simple than that.....Just having someone being by my side where ever I end up...Be it here or halfway across the planet and being there growing my faith and life with them, as a Muslim completing half of my Deen (faith) is something compulsary......Just that simple thing and I'd feel whole. One thing that I know that does make me happy is to keep on laughing, being silly, be the best I can be now to myself and all around me and just living the blessed life I do have and just looking up to the one above with thankfulness for everyday I have.
But I guess this blog helps me go through this phase and see what goodness I DO have around me.
I have been so so blessed to reach where I am now. I dropped out of university, never really got much of an education, but somehow....I have been able to travel to far lands, see amazing things, work in some amazing organisations around some cool places in London and more importantly meet some amazing people along the way who I now carry within my life :)
This takes me to my latest venture, magical Marrakech....Travel has always been something that seems to calm me and just takes everything that worries me out of my mind. However I never expected the effect Magical Marrakech would have on me.
I guess it starts before I left the UK for some reason I was feeling more so emotional and I had no idea as to why. As I was at Kings Cross standing at my usual spot on the Victoria line with my back pack and suitcase, the Victoria line came and the doors flew open, and there I saw standing before me a dear friend from the past. As soon as I saw her I did feel emotional as unfortunately she had lost her mother a few months back, but the fact that I had not seen her in years and our instant reaction was hugging and crying.....It made me think sometimes the one above really puts certain people in your path at certain points in your life when you really need them.
Marrakech is just three hours away which is nothing really when you think about it! I have always stayed in hotels, however this was a hostel/hotel which had the best of both. This was a Riad complex which has a beautiful quarter in the centre with a fountain and pool. This was based in the Old Median part of Marrakech and it was certainly an eye opener on the evening of arrival. One thing I heard was that in Marrakech you are ment to be modest and humble with where you live, hence why something on the outside can look like a hot mess....But when you enter a home/Riad you see the hidden inner beauty of the place....The Rodamon definitely showed this....A peacful place from the outside chaos of the old medina.
The evening of arriving and walking through the old Medina at night where the donkey carts & motorbikes whizzing past you literally 3 inches from you in all directions and people walking and the gazillion of stray cute cats catching my eye it certainly was an eye opener. What was more surprising no one had any collisions the whole time being there. The narrow streets of the Old Medina felt so familure yet something new that my eyes had set upon for the first time.
Everyone knew everyone, and one thing that stood out everyone in the old medina works hard by trade. The old man in the shoe repair hut next to the tailor who was opposite the barbers.....It had such a community and homely feel. And anothing thing that took me by surprise (I don't know why, but how international Marrakech is). Like Dubai the ratio of expacts to locals stood out also. However the locals seemed to of adapted to this and had not been phased by the influx.
Marrakech is SO safe and easy to get around, not once getting lost in the souks! But by being friendly and smiling to the locals does help on your daily journey.
One of the most chaotic part by far is the Jamaa El Fnaa....Now I'm a city chick, I know my way around and spent a lot of time down the east ends of London, know the ghetto streets of Mauritius like the back of mi hand and born in Cheetham hill fam....However I don't think any of that could have prepped me of what to expect in the Square....If I am honest it is the one place I would not go back in a rush for....But it is something you should experience. The fact that the locals had the worse east end cockney accents ever and stuff like saying "All wiite Fish N Chips" "Wagwaan Fam" "Hello Cat slater" left US even more confused and wtf is going on here kinda vibe...That said my friend and I walked along the square and looked for a roof toop resturant to hide out in. I looked up and saw a resturant called "Zaitoon" and straight away took it as a sign of somesort while in the chaotic square (My grandmother wanted to calle me Zaitoon which means Olive in arabic lol).
We headed up and sat by the side and felt much more at ease and relaxed hearing the buzz from down below. It was there that we sat next to an amazing couple from Essex who had been travelling around Morocco for over a month. They where so humble and open to talk to. They had been married for 30 years and had three sons, they where 50 & 60 and what we least expected they converted to Islam 2 years ago & even re-married the Islamic way (Nikkah at regents park Mosque) Being muslim I did feel touched by this however more so we had a spiritual connection. I am practising, however it was beautiful to see a couple go through this together. We ended up speaking with them for over three hours and we did keep in touch. It was an eye opener in the sense that I admired that they loved to travel and be together as their sons had grown and now had their own kids. No matter what age you are when you travel you are also seeking further into your own knowledge and always learning more about yourself. Its is so easy for us to get caught up in the daily grind, but we forget we can have an adventure and there really is a big world out there to discover.
I have to admit I have always stayed in hotels where ever I have been, and this was the first time I had stayed in a hostel. What I really loved about it was that how everyone is more interactive and friendly. We met some amazing people from Germany, Italy, LA, Brazil. The magic of social media has also enabled us to keep in touch too :)
On my flight back I was sat next to a gentleman from Kuwait. I never expected to have such an in depth conversation about life in general and it was so refreshing. He informed me he was part of a globalisation project and how we can make the world a better place by all coming together. This is where he mentioned that he feels people forget what is really important in life....We all work and have a routine but this is where he mentioned he applies the three 'L's in his life...."Learning to Love Life". When I heard this I felt like a light bulb ping in my head and felt really inspired by this. I know this year my work has taken over a lot of my time and taken me away from the things that I love mainly travel....By taking the three "L"s im hoping to apply this more and hope others can think and take something away from this.
Marrakech has made a big impression on my heart and I cannot wait to go back Insha"Allah (God willing). When you visit a new place, your either going to connect with it or not...But for some reason I felt so at home, at ease....At peace there. When I came back I was so upset and yes I did cry...I felt so touched by the warmth of everyone we met and felt humble that we had an amazing time and just so so blessed ..I have only ever felt that each time I come back from the motherland that is Mauritius so to me that says a lot...It made me think how everything fit into place from the get go. Every encounter was meant to be and that there are some amazing kind warm people in this world....A little kindess
indeed goes a long way no matter the distance....❤