Saturday 23 November 2013

Letter of Complaint to the Universe.......

I am writing on behalf of all single females, I am appalled by the lack of decent male species that there are on this planet. What is one to do these days, like seriously?! I am astounded how many decent amazing females that I know who are in this same situation as myself. I think Man kind needs to sit down and have a good think about this as Women kind seems to be at a standstill due to this issue.

Yours Sincerely, 

Halaal Chick In The City 

Sunday 17 November 2013

Friday 15 November 2013

Winter is here.......


I can barely have energy to be out and about strutting my stuff in this cold, all I think about is my fleecy onsie and bed and TV....I think I am going into Husband hibernation.....(searching season closed due to cold weather!)......However I have a feeling I may wake up something like this........(please note Id prob request Chocolate from point 3min 28 Seconds and everything after that!!!.....in that very same state also may I add).

Monday 11 November 2013

What's worse....bad hair day or bumping into your first crush, or both combined......?

For those who did not know, or like myself just found out today is in fact 'Anti-Valentines day'......Well in China it is anyway! But I like their thinking!!! A day dedicated to single people! Heck it should be a national forced public holiday world wide!!! A day we are acknowledged take over the world by force and every chained to a person (married) can be envious for once!

Today.....I think I was reminded exactly why I am still single......Today being a typical wintry day in the UK, it was cold, dark and it was raining that rain that is so small and light yet still frizzes your hair into the biggest frizz ball going on your head and no matter how much to try to pat it down or do whatever.....its just there.....a mess.

As I scurried out of the train station I caught sight of a guy standing by the entrance, clever enough to be sheltered from this rain smartly dress, looking neat and tidy...Looked like someone who works in the city. As I walked towards my destination we caught eyes, and he held his gaze for a few seconds with a slight expression of ''I know your face, and then switched to 'I DO know your face'' and just after that click of the penny dropping of who I was, I scurried even.......FASTER!

This is the story of my....first crush.

I think I know now why my parents put me in a girls secondary school.....I'm not sure if it was for my own protection and sanity or the outside pre-teen world. Leaving secondary school and going into college was a big step and big move......well one major factor of change......BOYS!!!!!

I made friends quickly at college.....but somehow I can't remember how, where when....but I saw this guy at college and omg...that was it.....my ''Crush'' was born. Being a young teen back then......it's clear to say girls of that age in our present day of age are faaaarrrr more advanced from what I was anyway.  And if this was present day, this whole lil escapade would have probably been dealt with in a different manner. He was a year older then me, looking back din't even dress that well...had one of them record bags that where in trend....and now I'm really gonna say it...and feel mega old.......he had a.....I can't bring myself to say it..........a PAGER!......Yes this is how far back we are going.

As I made new friends in college I found out where this guy worked (Burger King), and got more details......including being handed his pager number.....

I felt like I had been given a Tetris 4 line combo!! I had some sort of Power a real communication link STRAIGHT TO HIM!!!! I did not waste time of course I went to the in house pay phone and slotted that 10p min there to get my message's worth!  I remember along the lines of dictating to the person on the other line ''I've been watching you....your mystery girl'' Of course thinking I sounded demur, inviting and this will SOOOOO win him over, little did I know and realise what a complete physco I must of sounded.....or looked.

For some bizarre reason my friend said I should go into Berger King (to see her of course).  I would sit not too close but also not too far...... so with all my ''mystery pager messages'' and me now turning up to his work.. I was trying to put the subtle message of....'hey'...no wonder I must of looked like I had issues....I think now.....I like to put it down to 'lack of social skills towards the opposite sex.' Now the thing with me.....and I admit I think this still happens.....if I like you....I tend to ignore you or not speak to you.......stupid and defeats the purpose I know, but I can admire you from afar and everything, but can't for the life of me play it cool and demure, have a normal convo with out feeling hot and bothered without perving on someone I find attractive or like......FACT.  I do however go quiet.....and try and carry on all normal....to which my close friends call 'Going all Elizabeth Bennet are we?'.

So I think he found out (really not sure how he would have)...but I remember just in case he dint know it was me.....and went and did something even more stupid....I put pen to paper and wrote to him (never had a face to face conversation with him by the way).  There I did it, signed sealed my thoughts and feelings to paper and got a messenger to pass it to him.  Needles to say he never responded, and sent a message in a form of a friend.....along the lines of 'thanks but no thanks'....and that was it....it all stopped..my friends where there of course to pick the pieces......I think they knew the outcome.....looking back, I do think what a loony bin I was, but yes I guess we have all done silly things in the name of.....having a crush.



 



Tuesday 5 November 2013

Monday 4 November 2013

Hunting in the urban jungle.....

Today I was wearing my trade mark leopard look which I must admit I had not worn in a while and someone did say I looked like I was going on safari....I said yes I'm hunting for my husband!!!

I was talking to someone else at work on the way out of the office, never spoken to her in my life but as I was touching up my make up to meet a friend for dinner, she said I dint need to touch up and that I was beautiful as I was....bless her.  I thanked her and then I went and complained as always, that still don't help the fact that I am still single!!!

As we walked out onto the busy street busy with people getting ready for that evening pre weekend feeling, she said ' You just have to grab him/one and don't let go!'  She said if you see one, just go up to him and ask for the time....she made it sound so easy!?!!  ( I must add she is fabulously French and has that warm flair and laughter that is so infectious, charming and endearing....honest). I asked her if she was married and she burst into a cheeky laugh and said yes, but said she would trade it all for a day just to be single again and we both laughed (She is amazingly joyous you cant help not get swept up in it! :) Everyone married always says make the most of it now....so I am....I am waking up at 2pm in my pjs at the weekend, not sorting my She/He facial hairs on my face and legs....so at weekends I have resorted to She-Cave-women and by Monday morning I'm all polished and preened for the working week.

I have actually thought about going to meet a guy in my 'au natural' state....after all once you are married, they need to see who they wake up to, they run a mile then they just ain't cave-man enough also got to remember it's a jungle out there!!! :p

Oh I forgot to mention the online thing.....just not happening.....I got a polite message from a guy who informed me that we are a match and have a few things in common, he left his email address and then mentioned his full name and told me to 'Youtube' him......so I did and came across him and many videos......and one in particular stood out....he was just standing there in his suit and tie......hold a spoon.....and then held two fingers to his temple and closed his eyes for a few sections.....and then started to move the spoon.....when I mean move.........he's a Spoon bender.....well....we shall leave it at that.

Ciao for now ;)

(PS I wanted the bear to win!)